Robert Charles Durfee: ‘The nicest, friendliest guy you could ever want to meet”

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Robert Charles Durfee

Robert Charles Durfee

Robert Charles Durfee, 79, of Fairhaven, CA, passed away on January 16, 2021, surrounded by his family, after a valiant fight against Alzheimer’s. He was born to Bradford and Agnes Durfee on June 9, 1941, in Fall River, Massachusetts.

Bob attended school in Fall River, graduating from Durfee High School in 1959. He had joined the Navy prior to his graduation and upon completion of his basic training, became the sailor who never set foot on a ship, working on heavy equipment as a “Sea-Bee” with duty stations in Port Huaneme and Okinawa, before ending his Naval career at Centerville Naval Base in Ferndale. Upon his discharge in 1963, he remained in Fortuna, CA, moving his heavy equipment experience to Pacific Lumber Company. Shortly thereafter, he met the love of his life, Ellen Hines, and they were married on December 20, 1964, at the height of the 1964 Flood. The family at home were sure that the newlyweds had been lost to the floodwaters, but instead they were spending a memorable honeymoon bunking with other refugees near Benbow.

Bob went to work for the City of Fortuna in the Water Department and soon became a volunteer firefighter, working his way to the rank of Captain. He also took on the management of the Fire Department’s Roller Skating rink, which he continued until 1986 when FFD Skating transitioned to the management of the City.

Bob and Ellen’s married life took a calmer turn after their exciting honeymoon, and they welcomed two daughters to their family, Beth, in February 1966, and Wendy, in November 1968. Bob became an integral part of Ellen’s large family, and they also traveled with the girls frequently to the East Coast to visit Bob’s parents and extended family in Massachusetts.

In September 1977, Bob entered professional fire service, as Assistant Fire Chief for the Fairhaven Fire Department, serving the pulp mills on the Samoa Peninsula. He served as an active member of the Humboldt County Fire Prevention Officers and the Arson Task Force. He retired from the then named Samoa Peninsula Fire in 1996, but continued as a volunteer Chief for several more years. In 1999, he went to work for Hydesville Water Department and re-joined the Fortuna Fire Department as a volunteer.

In addition to his time with his family and his dedication to his work, Bob spent twenty years obtaining his Associates’ degree from College of the Redwoods, usually one class at a time, graduating in June 1991. He also continued his professional education with stints at the Fire Academy in Emmitsburg, Maryland and Asilomar in Monterey, California.

Bob was the nicest, friendliest guy you could ever want to meet, and his involvement in so many organizations made him many friends in his community. He was a member of the Elks Lodge, joining only after he could be a fully participating member; Humboldt Ski Club’ and The Humboldt County Stamp Club. He was regular donor to the Northern California Community Blood Bank, with lifetime donations in excess of twenty gallons. Bob was also an active participant in all of Ellen’s multiple Board organizations, helping anywhere he could, be it setting up tables for meetings or putting stamps on mailings.

In 2018, Bob joined one more organization, Humboldt Alzheimer’s Association. He was diagnosed with this insidious disease in 2016 and, as always, stepped up to do what he could. Bob became a spokesperson for Humboldt’s Walk to End Alzheimer’s. He spoke up in hopes that others would as well; his message was that the more people admitted their own diagnosis and acknowledged the severity of this health crisis, the more likely that funding could be made available to find a cure. He always understood that his efforts were not going to help him, but were undertaken to help others. To this end, he also testified before the State Assembly Health Committee in support of a bill to finance more research into finding a cure for Alzheimer’s. His perspective was always, ‘Why not me?’, in a battle that so many others are also embroiled in every day. Bob also attempted to participate in drug trials, but his own disease process and his remote location in Humboldt County ultimately made that impossible.

In the last months of 2020, Bob’s condition had worsened to the point that Hospice of Humboldt came into the picture. The Durfees had long had an association with Hospice, as Ellen was on that Board of Directors for 11 years. This organization soon demonstrated why that had been a worthwhile choice in the amazing care and assistance they provided in the last month of Bob’s life. The nurses, aides, and counselors—both social and spiritual—were a Godsend, to Bob, and to the rest of the family as well. They were able to help keep him comfortable while also preparing the rest of the family for the imminent. His nurse, Christy, was able to identify that his days were drawing to a close, allowing Beth and Wendy to be present with Ellen, and two of his grandchildren, as he finally slipped to a more peaceful rest.

Bob was preceded in death by his parents; his brother, Bradford Durfee, father-in-law, Ernest Hines, brother-in-law, Randy Hines, and his son-in-law, Tracy Collins. He leaves behind his wife and best friend of 57 years, Ellen; his daughter and son-in-law, Beth Ellyn & James Harville; his daughter, Wendy Sue Collins; grandchildren, Nathaniel Grow, Ryan Truby & wife Kaylee, Hollyn Harville, and Jackson Harville; great-grand daughters, Baylee Sue Grow and (soon-to-arrive) baby girl Truby; mother-in-law, Vivienne Hines-Betz; brothers-in-law, Ben Hines & wife Judy, Craig Hines & partner Shelley, and Joe Hines; numerous nieces, nephews, and cousins, by both blood and marriage; as well as many other family members and dear friends.

At this time, services will be deferred until the people who loved and were loved by Bob can gather in a fitting fashion. In the meantime, the family would be honored by donations in Bob’s name to the Humboldt County Walk to End Alzheimer’s, Hospice of Humboldt, Fortuna Fire Department or Samoa Peninsula Fire Department.

If you would like to make a donation in memory of Bob to the Alzheimer’s Association, you can mail a check to: Alzheimer’s Association, P.O. Box 2542, McKinleyville, CA 95519. A card will then be sent to Ellen and her family letting her know that a donation was made in memory of Bob. If you prefer to make a credit card donation, you can contact Kim Coelho, Community Engagement Manager for the Alzheimer’s Association, at 707-407-8826.

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29 Comments
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Gilligin
Guest
Gilligin
3 years ago

Good words written about a great man. Your sense of humor and wisdom will truly be missed.
Rest easy Chief Durfee

Ellen Durfee
Guest
Ellen Durfee
3 years ago
Reply to  Gilligin

Thank you from Bob’s family.

NOREEN O'BRIEN
Guest
3 years ago

Bob was always a gentleman, kind, and respectful to everyone.
His passing is a true loss for his family and the community at large.
RIP Chief Durfee

Ellen Durfee
Guest
Ellen Durfee
3 years ago
Reply to  NOREEN O'BRIEN

Thank you, Noreen.

Tyler hines
Guest
Tyler hines
3 years ago

RIP Uncle Bob, we will all miss you very much.

Ellen Durfee
Guest
Ellen Durfee
3 years ago
Reply to  Tyler hines

Love you, Tyler. Thank you so much for coming over that night. Aunt Ellen

Amy
Guest
Amy
3 years ago

RIP Bob. The big family we are all a part of will miss you and your smile!I remember the get togethers at the fire hall in fair haven. Memories that I am truly fond of. Thank you. We all know you are in a better place and we will see you again someday. Please say hi to my Papa and Uncle Herb. We all miss them too.

Ellen Durfee
Guest
Ellen Durfee
3 years ago
Reply to  Amy

Thank you, Amy. Your memories are so true.

K. Kay Byrnes
Guest
K. Kay Byrnes
3 years ago

My deepest sympathies go out to you and your family. May God give you the peace that you seek.

please provide additional information on donations.

Kim Coelho
Guest
Kim Coelho
3 years ago
Reply to  K. Kay Byrnes

If you would like to make a donation in memory of Bob to the Alzheimer’s Association, you can mail a check to:
Alzheimer’s Association, P.O. Box 2542, McKinleyville, CA 95519. A card will then be sent to Ellen and her family letting her know that you made a donation in memory of Bob. If you prefer to make a credit card donation, you can call me at 707-407-8826. Kim Coelho, Community Engagement Manager for the Alzheimer’s Association.

Ellen Durfee
Guest
Ellen Durfee
3 years ago
Reply to  K. Kay Byrnes

Thank you so much. As you can now see the above comment gives the local Alzheimer’s information. Hospice of Humboldt’s address is: 3327 Timber Fall Court, Eureka, CA 95503. Samoa Peninsula Fire is: 1982 Gass Street, Samoa, CA 95564. Fortuna Fire is: 320 S. Fortuna Blvd., Fortuna, CA 95540. They all loved Bob.

Richard Philipsen
Guest
Richard Philipsen
3 years ago

So sadden to read of Bob’s passing. I met Bob in the early 1960s when he and some others from the Navy base at Centerville would congregate at Tom and Georgia Young’s Candyland Fountain in Fortuna in their free time. I think he was born with a permanent smile. Through the years our paths would occasionally cross, and he never forgot those he knew from years past, and always a short visit. He was truly a wonderful fellow.

Ellen Durfee
Guest
Ellen Durfee
3 years ago

That is when I met him, also. And we enjoyed every minute of each other’s company. Thank you for your caring. Ellen

DEAN GLASER
Guest
DEAN GLASER
3 years ago

Bob,
As a fellow Navy sailor, I want to thank you for your service. As a fellow Fortuna volunteer firefighter, I also want to thank you for your full dedication to the safety of our City and other localities.
You attended all of our 9-11 Memorials in Fortuna; and you stood by my side at Park and Main Street as the procession of fire apparatus passed by on 9-11-2015.
It was an honor to have known you.

Ellen Durfee
Guest
Ellen Durfee
3 years ago
Reply to  DEAN GLASER

Thank you.

Theresa m adams
Guest
3 years ago

My condolences to you Wendy and family

Ellen Durfee
Guest
Ellen Durfee
3 years ago

Thank you.

Mike Cline
Guest
3 years ago

A gentleman and a friend, always willing to share his knowledge.

Ellen Durfee
Guest
Ellen Durfee
3 years ago
Reply to  Mike Cline

Thank you.

Joanne Conzelmann
Guest
Joanne Conzelmann
3 years ago

Bob has been such an inspiration to all of us who volunteer with the Humboldt Walk to End Alzheimer’s. He stood up and stood out to represent those who are facing Alzheimer’s disease. He advocated on the state level and was instrumental in getting funding levels for research increased. He would also wear his Alzheimer’s shirt around and was happy to tell people he had Alzheimer’s and we had work to do to stop this disease. We will miss him so much! His warmth and good humor touched each person he met. To his family, thank you for sharing him with us. Truly, thank you! Heartfelt sympathy and condolences to you all 💜.

Ellen Durfee
Guest
Ellen Durfee
3 years ago

Thank you, Joanne. He loved being a part of the Walk Committee so very much. You have been a wonderful friend to us as this progressed and curtailed his ability to participate. Bob and our entire family deeply appreciate your loving kindness. Ellen

Cheryl Brunk
Guest
Cheryl Brunk
3 years ago

Thank you for sharing your story with so many people, you were an inspiration and gave many hope.

Ellen Durfee
Guest
Ellen Durfee
3 years ago
Reply to  Cheryl Brunk

Thank you so much.

Kim Coelho
Guest
Kim Coelho
3 years ago

I am so grateful that I had the opportunity to work along side Bob, his wife Ellen and his granddaughter Hollyn in the planning of the Humboldt County Walk to End Alzheimer’s. Bob was fearless in his quest to do whatever it took to take the sigma away from this disease. He spoke at our Walk opening ceremony, at our regional Walk trainings, and told his story to legislators at the Alzheimer’s Association Advocacy Day at the CA State Capitol. Thank you Bob for all the support you provided fellow Alzheimer’s patients and their families. You will be sorely missed.

Ellen Durfee
Guest
Ellen Durfee
3 years ago
Reply to  Kim Coelho

Thank you, Kim. You are so right, he is missed so much by so many. But, we his family, are glad that he is no longer in such pain and distress, he is in a much better place now. I’ve heard varying stories of what he is doing right now, from skiing, riding motorcycle with our late son-in-law, to waiting for warmer weather so he can swim on Horseneck Beach in Massachusetts where he grew up. Ellen

Kathleen Fitzgerald MD
Guest
Kathleen Fitzgerald MD
3 years ago

Bob was the older brother I never had. Bob was my cousin, his mother was my father’s only sister. While only 7 years difference in ages, and as the oldest of 8, Bob always was there for me. great memories. Rest easy, Bob

Ellen Durfee
Guest
Ellen Durfee
3 years ago

So very glad to hear from you, Kathy. You know Bob’s favorite babysitting story about you was how you could never figure out that he always knew you were awake (The holding your breath thing.) Love to you from all of us. Ellen

Jenn
Guest
Jenn
3 years ago

He was a great neighbor. I loved chatting with him on his walks around Fairhaven. He would talk my ear off. His friendship provided a sense of safety for me as a single female living in the neighborhood. I remember when Fairhaven was expecting the threat of a tsunami several years ago, Durfee came to my house and banged on my door at 3am making sure I was awake to evacuate.

My condolences to the family. I’m sorry for you loss. He will be missed.

Ellen Durfee
Guest
Ellen Durfee
3 years ago
Reply to  Jenn

Thank you, Jenn. We miss having you down the street. Ellen