‘I am Not Sure When Transgender Turned Into Pedophile’: A Reader Writes an Open Letter to the Community
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A Humboldt resident, Autumn Murphy Hargrave, speaks her mind on the national debate on whether transgender people should use the bathroom of their birth gender or the bathroom in which they feel most comfortable.
This whole bathroom transgender issue in the news has me confused. I am not sure when transgender turned into pedophile. Today I listened to some guy from Georgia telling me to speak my mind on this issue. This is my piece of mind on the subject of transgender bathroom use and this is all I have to contribute on the subject.
I know transgender folks. I know gay and lesbian folks. I know pedophile folks too. The transgender, gay and lesbian folks I know are all a little freaky, a lot awesome, mostly normal, no less so than me or you. Some have families of their own. They all live lives built around home, hearth, community and tribe. A few of them are just starting out in this life. Young women taking those first steps they are into a never kind world. I love them or like them. Depending on which one. I have never once thought of any moment in their lives to be so different from mine, I could not trust them with my safety. Or my sons’ safety.
As for the pedophile folks I know, yeah you read right, folks. As in plural. They were all three real pedderass types. The type that just loved the intimate layers of good little scared southern girls ages 5-10. There were three of them. Two men and one woman. A girl really. Most likely venting her own rage over being violated long before she found me. So two men. Two penis toting, hetero, all American males and one intact female introduced me to the real monsters. The ones who trap little girls and find the place little girls are always told to protect. Until they cannot. Until someone bigger stronger faster comes along and does exactly what you all are afraid some transgender person is gonna do to your kid in a Target bathroom.
Well long before I ever went to a Target, there was that house and his room. I went to that house almost every weekend. I knew it as well as I knew my own. On that weekend in that one moment I was in the play room with a jump rope, the next moment I was under him. I remember looking into his eyes and with all my courage, I told him I was gonna tie him up with that jump rope if he did not let me go. I told him I would tie him up and bite his nose off. He was strong and determined. I was 7. This man is a family man today. A father and husband. I was so afraid of telling on him because he made other people in my life happy.
As for the other man who introduced me to the real dirty old man, he enjoyed holding me down and kissing me in ways only lovers should kiss. This man held no power over me other than his size, so I told my dad about him. My dad never made me visit that old man again. But no one was punished. No one was taken away by police or even grounded by his parents.
Hurts happen and little girls get violated in vile ways. All of it just sits sour in my memories. And when I was a little older at the ripe ole age of 8, a young woman my mother had trusted to watch over me until my dad came to fetch me made up her own child care plan. The one thing I remember more than anything else from that horrible moment, was how angry she seemed. The whole time she was putting me through her misuse of my tiny body, I was thinking about how angry and hurt she must be to do those things to me.
So you see, spoken from the mouth of someone who was completely over powered by pedophiles and violated in ways her little girl mind could not process, it was never once a transgender person who stole those moments from me. It was never in a public bathroom at Target or with strangers. I knew each one of my monsters and each place I was molested.
Just because another human being makes a different sexual/life style choice than you, it does not make them a sexual predator.
Autumn Murphy Hargrave