‘I am Not Sure When Transgender Turned Into Pedophile’: A Reader Writes an Open Letter to the Community

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A Humboldt resident, Autumn Murphy Hargrave, speaks her mind on the national debate on whether transgender people should use the bathroom of their birth gender or the bathroom in which they feel most comfortable.

This whole bathroom transgender issue in the news has me confused. I am not sure when transgender turned into pedophile. Today I listened to some guy from Georgia telling me to speak my mind on this issue. This is my piece of mind on the subject of transgender bathroom use and this is all I have to contribute on the subject.

I know transgender folks. I know gay and lesbian folks. I know pedophile folks too. The transgender, gay and lesbian folks I know are all a little freaky, a lot awesome, mostly normal, no less so than me or you. Some have families of their own. They all live lives built around home, hearth, community and tribe. A few of them are just starting out in this life. Young women taking those first steps they are into a never kind world. I love them or like them. Depending on which one. I have never once thought of any moment in their lives to be so different from mine, I could not trust them with my safety. Or my sons’ safety.

As for the pedophile folks I know, yeah you read right, folks. As in plural. They were all three real pedderass types. The type that just loved the intimate layers of good little scared southern girls ages 5-10. There were three of them. Two men and one woman. A girl really. Most likely venting her own rage over being violated long before she found me. So two men. Two penis toting, hetero, all American males and one intact female introduced me to the real monsters. The ones who trap little girls and find the place little girls are always told to protect. Until they cannot. Until someone bigger stronger faster comes along and does exactly what you all are afraid some transgender person is gonna do to your kid in a Target bathroom.

Well long before I ever went to a Target, there was that house and his room. I went to that house almost every weekend. I knew it as well as I knew my own. On that weekend in that one moment I was in the play room with a jump rope, the next moment I was under him. I remember looking into his eyes and with all my courage, I told him I was gonna tie him up with that jump rope if he did not let me go. I told him I would tie him up and bite his nose off. He was strong and determined. I was 7. This man is a family man today. A father and husband. I was so afraid of telling on him because he made other people in my life happy.

As for the other man who introduced me to the real dirty old man, he enjoyed holding me down and kissing me in ways only lovers should kiss. This man held no power over me other than his size, so I told my dad about him. My dad never made me visit that old man again. But no one was punished. No one was taken away by police or even grounded by his parents.

Hurts happen and little girls get violated in vile ways. All of it just sits sour in my memories. And when I was a little older at the ripe ole age of 8, a young woman my mother had trusted to watch over me until my dad came to fetch me made up her own child care plan. The one thing I remember more than anything else from that horrible moment, was how angry she seemed. The whole time she was putting me through her misuse of my tiny body, I was thinking about how angry and hurt she must be to do those things to me.

So you see, spoken from the mouth of someone who was completely over powered by pedophiles and violated in ways her little girl mind could not process, it was never once a transgender person who stole those moments from me. It was never in a public bathroom at Target or with strangers. I knew each one of my monsters and each place I was molested.

Just because another human being makes a different sexual/life style choice than you, it does not make them a sexual predator.

Autumn Murphy Hargrave

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58 comments

  • See that is the issue, know one is saying a transgender person is or will be a sexual predator. This is what is wrong with liberals. Know where in any bill,and legislation does it even mention that the transgender person is why laws are being passed to prevent any straight guy from entering the gym shower with your daughter. But atleast it show you have know grounds to stand on like the rest of your liberal friends when you have to deflect away from the subject and make it about something it isnt. disagree with a women and your anti women, disagree with the president and your racist. oh unless you disagree with a republican women liek sarah palin. like how the president and the liberals smeared her but then your not anti women. or when the liberals and the president went after clarence thomas oh then your not a racist. If your mind is to shallow to realize that sexual predators will use these laws that allow any man to say he is a women and enter the gymwomens gym showers, like at the ywca . you know there you are taking your daughter to the y for swim lesson, after the lesson you both goto the showers to rinse the chlorine off and when you turn around there is a man naked getting ready for his shower. but he says im not a man i am a women and because of the law you supported there is nothing illegal about it or anything you can. Or how about you get up everyday and goto the gym before work, after your workout you got the showers to wash the sweat off so you can get to work on time and boom there is a man in the locker room doing the same thing. so when these hypotheticals happen to you just remeber it is what you supported and it is what you wanted

    • You are what’s wrong with this country!

    • Father nailed a lot of it. People aren’t against transgendered, they’re against being forced to accept conditions that allow violent offenders to masquerade as transgendered. There isn’t any better way I can think of to instill anger into an issue that before now wasn’t even considered. It’s easy to sabotage tolerance, as we can clearly see.
      Not only that, but women’s bathrooms do not have urinals that men use. Just the angry screams alone from those who Accidentally sat to pee on wet seats should deter most businesses from accepting such forced conditions. It’s not very healthy either, where is big brother health now?
      Less than 2-3% people are gay. They actually get mad if asked which gender they are. Out of this 2-3%, take a guess at how many lesbians would be comfortable sharing a shower with a penis.
      This controversy is pushed onto all of us, but is mostly detrimental to those who didn’t warn others of a man in the girls room, or visa versa. Why wouldn’t they speak up and warn? Peer pressure? Hardly. A genuine man trapped in a woman’s body knows dam well how intimidating it is to be around the wrong sex. They would never impose the same on others. Got a hose, use the hose room. Got a pail, use the pail room.
      All this does is set lawyers & lawmakers up for lawsuits. In ny city, you can be fined for accidentally mistaking the gender of your bartender.
      Peer pressure in comments? You all do realize don’t you that many get paid to comment, some are just antagonizers, some are confused on what’s acceptable, some are behind bars planning their next adventure. Peer pressure isn’t what it used to be.

        • Ok I have a question… My husband is disabled. I have taken him into the women’s bathroom… I warned the women I was bringing him…at the time he did not”look” disabled…a rare form of dementia… Most women were ok with it…however.. On the way out the door I hear a woman say from behind the stall door…” You could have taken him outside” …seriously? He had to poop….seriously? Outside is not an option…now I’m scared of being shot or beat up because either way… We were both in the”wrong” bathroom… We are both innocent victims here… So tell me…. Which bathroom is gonna be the correct one? Personally I don’t really care who is the stall next to me as long as they close the door and no one is being hurt… I just wanna pee and get the hell out! And one more piece of info just FYI…most child molesters are smarter than you think… Not gonna dress up as a male or female…statistics show… Most, are teachers, pastors, coaches, friends of the family, uncles, brothers, aunts… Ppl that you”trust” to some extent to be around your children! Examples;; Penn state coach, Jared from subway, Jerry hastert, even John Wayne Gacy used to do home parties dressed as a clown! I can’t remember ever hearing of one that was transgendered…. So tell me please which bathroom is the correct one for ppl like my husband and myself! My “golden” rule when my daughter was little… Never and I mean never did I let her into a public restroom alone! Who does that anyway?

      • Last time I was in Target it had a “family” bathroom that you could use and lock the door. Use that one if you’re confused about your plumbing. Have some consideration for the rest of society.

      • No they are afraid of transgender people, the same way they were afraid gay people would either molest their kids or turn them gay. Its based on religion, lije abortion, and we are supposed to have a separation between church and state.
        We all havta accept laws we don’t like, that’s democracy. I hate that churches get such huge tax breaks but I have to live with it.
        I think I will put a no Christians sign on my bathroom door, am scared they’ll rub off on my kids. That’s basically what is being proposed, its discrimination. Didn’t Jesus say to respect people? Turn the other cheek?

      • Assaulting those who protect others, especially the vulnerable, is, well, let’s just say, thanks for confirming my points.
        The Transgendered have been using the facilities that suit their needs for forever. Being discreet, nobody knew the difference. Suddenly it’s forced upon us by those who wish to inspire agendas. I feel bad for the genuine transgendered for being used in political agendas. They are good people, they don’t deserve this BS.

    • re: father = i think you’re describing the behavior of an exhibitionist. not that of some transgender just taking a shower as would anyone else.
      with kids seeing nudity in situations you describe…growing kids from seeds you should be open to the idea that curious kids can play dr to learn, or learning anatomical differences from its parents/care-providers/people raising kids, as the kids ask about boys vs girls (usually pretty early).

      healthy attitudes about nudity, privacy, respect and courtesy taught to kids is also a good start?

      i’ve been assaulted and had a variety of men expose themselves to myself and at times my little brother with me. never once in a bathroom.
      but once in the main office of my grade school a janitor molested me-was he g/l/b/t? all i know is he terrified me and he smelled bad.
      …when my older sister w/5 & mom took her to a movie. sis when to the theater bathroom alone and was raped by a man in a bathroom stall. mom should been with her, protect her. i’m the only person in the world, besides my sister who knows. shame! her’s. 60 yrs later she is ashamed she did something to bring it on.

      learn how to protect your kids w/o freaking your kids out.
      educate yourself about what a pedophile is and what he wants,
      and what are those g/l/b/t are and what do they want.

      we can’t use anymore broad paintbrushes. it’s a new day.

    • Father – I completely understand and take a second and please help me with this question.

      There are a lot of transgender men(born women) who look very much like a biological man (please Google buck angel)

      So my question is: because buck angel would be obligated to be in the women’s bathroom, if buck walked in with another man(biological) how will you know the difference? Doesn’t this help camouflage actual men? Isn’t this worse?
      Before at least they had to “put on a dress and wigs” now they can just stroll in and say they have a vagina.

    • Bobbie Jo Justice

      [edit]
      Where were you when PEDOPHILE CATHOLIC PRIESTS were molesting kids?

      [edit] you think a criminal is going to obey any type of law? Gee, then we should have made breaking into peoples homes, kidnapping and murdering children against the law, it might have saved 9 year old Jessica Lunsofrd in Florida.

      The only thing these stupid bathroom laws do is to HARASS transgender people. They do NOTHING about making anyone any safer.

  • Thank you for your honesty. You took these words right out of the hidden spot deep inside that I rarely share. And funny thing I hold the same opinion of this silly bathroom debate. Im sure there will be predators in a gender neutral bathroom someday simply because they can be anywhere, but I will be to busy using the bathroom to notice. The people I do pay more attention to are the ones I know. Or think I know. The well meaning, helpful, family member or friend. The one that assures me my daughter is perfectly safe with them and they have only my familys best interest at heart. Your predator is not waiting in a bathroom, they sit at your table at thanksgiving or on the bleachers at your sport event.

  • Wow. Incredibly honest and thought provoking. Excellent writing. Makes my heart hurt for the author as a child. Those predators should pay.Even though the predators were once preyed upon. God speed.

  • Yes we have to watch our kids everywhere in public but “Stranger Danger” programs may not be helping us see the really dangerous people.

    The Abel and Harlow Child Molestation Prevention Study found that 68% of pedophiles molested children in their own family:
    * Biological Child-19%
    * Stepchild, Adopted or Foster Child-30%
    * Brothers & Sisters-12%
    * Nieces & Nephews-18%
    * Grandchild-5%

    40% molested children of friends and neighbors
    5% exploited “a child left in my care”

    Since some pedophiles molested both family members and children of the community, none of the numbers add up to 100%. Many pedophiles are multiple offenders.

    But only 10% molested children (and their parents) who were strangers to the pedophile.
    That means that ninety percent were/are not strangers; up to 70 percent were/are family members.

    There’s an extract of the studies at http://www.childmolestationprevention.org/pdfs/study.pdf

    • Data from those who came forward. Where’s the rest of the data from those who didn’t? How many felt too stupid for shrugging off a bad feeling that otherwise would have saved them?
      Stats are only as good as the data that was collected.

  • Far more disturbing than the gender specific bathroom issue is the widespread and publicly accepted use of the trans-phobic term “Feminine Hygiene Products”. In this day and age not all females menstruate and not all people who menstruate identify as female. We need to pass a law to remove the word “feminine” from this term and put an end this atrocity once and for all.

  • Doesn’t matter if you’re a guy but you “feel” like a girl.. You’re still a fucking dude.
    Quit being spoiled cry baby[edit]
    You’ll never be anything other than what you are, no matter how many delusional lies you feed yourself.
    Using another genders bathroom does not solidify your delusions.
    [edit]

    • Tommy. You are an idiot!
      [edit]
      I am trans! I am not a cry baby myself, I stand six foot six in heels, I am built like Xena the warrior princess and trained in a variety of martial arts![edit]
      I am able, by my country’s up to date climate of tolerance, to update my birth certificate so no evidence of my transition will shown on it or on my passport. So I *WILL* pee in the ladies room when I come to the US and noone will even know about it but me! Noone will be molested! And, just in case you wanna put on a little pout about it, there is absolutely nothing [edit–you] can do about it. [edit]

    • I have to disagree for one chromosones don’t nessasarly determine male or female in the physical body fact. People born with genitals that can’t be identified as male or female and their parents have them altered to look like females and raise them as females a lot of those children end up killing them selves because they are really males. Fact a boy on the outside can have ovaries on the inside or testes on the inside of a female physical body. These are facts not my opinion do your research and get educated don’t go spouting off at the mouth about a subject unless you get the facts.I deal with issues that I know something about. Facts stone cold facts

  • Flower it up with all this tear jerking sentiment and it is still sick. Do not move the ancient landmarks, I would say men, whatever condition their head is in, should not use womens bathrooms.

    • Correct!! Very well said!
      Trans women are *women* though, (the clue is in the title), so they should!

  • Bathrooms are not designated based on gender. They are designated based on sex. This is obvious since our culture has only recently acknowledged that the social construct of gender, does not always “match” biological sex.

    If they are designated based on gender then we need more of them, some cultures have more than two genders.

    The reason we have two bathrooms is because people dont want to relieve themselves near people who they may be trying to mate with. If we stick with this origin of the bi-modal bathroom system, perhaps we need four bathrooms, depending on ones gender and orientation combination. (that would only work for a two gender system though)

    We could just all use the same bathrooms.

  • The basic problem here is that many men like the ones spout off here don’t understand that most of the world’s wars, rape, misery and aggression come from conservative males just like themselves who think nothing of trampling on the rights of women… But then suddenly like black magic they’ll pretend to care about women, However, only when it will help to tighten their patriotic strangle hold on feminism and people’s rights to equality that matches the white male’s.

    • Yes!! So well put! It is Patriarchy, and all the patriarchially-motivated imaginary friend obsessions that are affiliated with it to justify its associated bigotries. I am a woman! I have all the bits that traditionally identify me as a woman, lol. I also because I don’t live in a backward regime, driven by hatred and fear, am able to cover my *transitional tracks*. I am a (invisibly written, trans) woman. Noone will ever know I used to have a penis! Quite frankly, it is none of their goddam republican business!
      ⚡💋🐇💋⚡

  • I guess the only solution is to hire ” Gender Police” and post them at every bathroom, shower, gym room , and have them inspect private parts to make sure you are using correct room.. ( JOKING FOLKS)
    Transgender people have probably gone thru a lifetime of mental hell, getting where they are today.. Why humiliate, punish them further??
    I really didn’t know it was a problem until this Political campaign…

  • So interesting (to me anyhow) to see how much hate, fear & anger can be generaated by one person’s truth. Lotta love too. I go with the love.
    To the author of the letter, thank you for sharing. You are very brave. I applaud you

    • Stop with the hyperbole “hate fear & anger” the issue is a difference of opinion.

      • No sorry it’s about hate and discrimination against certain people. Look up how much the violence against Trans folks has gone up in the last year. Its all about fear, when in fact a majority of us are born with both and the docs decide. Seriously read about it.

  • The victimization and grievance industry is working overtime in the United States. Men should use the men’s room and women should use the women’s room. Go find a bathroom that has room for one and lock the door behind you. Many restrooms are unisex now, like Safeway’s in Fortuna.
    Have some consideration for the over 99% of people that don’t dress in the other sex’s clothing.
    Good grief.

  • Excellent piece. I commend the author for sharing something so personal and reliving the trauma. To those who are so offended by the whole bathroom issue, please set up different bathrooms in your own house, if you feel so strongly.

    Pedophiles are pedophiles, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity. Does having a men’s and women’s bathroom prevent rape or domestic violence or sexual abuse in society? If some of you put the same energy in standing up to those who victimize women and children in society, instead of this political red herring, we would live in a safer place.

  • This is all because the older generations were taught that “men-in-dresses” were all gay and that gay people were automatically creepy & pedos. And these old people (and the unfortunate minority of kids of theirs who they infected with their idiotic prejudices) just cannot get past the idea that identifiably transgender people are any different than the gay pedos their mommys&daddys warned them about. Of course this **homophobia** is just nonsense; most everyone knows that, too (that’s under 40 anyway lols) but since these people are still alive, they’re still gonna be exercising their illegit prejudices against any group they think are weaker than they are. (only what? 700,000 trans peeps in the country so yeh, pretty weak group–on their own anyway….) So. Pretty simple really. And pretty sad too.

  • The way I see it

    Suppose that a Caucasian man from Finland—call him Gunther—for whatever reason decides that he identifies as being of Sub-Saharan African descent. Suppose further that, in light of this, Gunther undergoes medical procedures to have his skin darkened and his skull’s bone structure re-shaped so as to resemble that of individuals of Sub-Saharan descent. Would we think that such a person has literally become of Sub-Saharan descent by way of him identifying as such and then undergoing the follow-up medical procedures? Of course not. He may believe in his own mind that he is truly Sub-Saharan and his appearance as someone of Sub-Saharan descent might be very convincing to others, but none of this changes the fact that he is not of Sub-Saharan descent.

    Similarly, suppose that a seventy-year-old man—call him Bob—comes to identify as a sixteen-year-old.
    Would I be considered a bigot if I chose to ignore his strange delusion or speak in public about my opposition to him pretending to be sixteen years old? Would it be immoral of me to vote against the creation of new laws that recognize and cater to the new ages that folks like Bob have assigned to themselves?

    The cases of Gunther and Bob and the situations of individuals who believe themselves to be transgender are perfectly analogous. What someone “identifies as” is irrelevant when the identity they adopt is contrary to reality. It is for this reason that we can classify mental disorders such as anorexia as the mental disorders that they are: they involve people having persistent, false beliefs about their identity. In the case of the anorexic, someone who is dangerously underweight believes falsely (but tenaciously) that they are really overweight. It would be proper procedure then for a therapist to help an anorexic individual to do away with their anorexia by restoring the individual’s mental faculties to their properly functioning state, one in which reality trumps fallacy. Proper treatment for similar mental disorders, such as gender dysphoria, should be no different. When it comes to the bathroom issue and others like it, what we as a society need to do is create public policy and encourage social norms that reflect the truth about the human person, not obfuscate the truth about such matters and sow the seeds of sexual confusion in future generations for years to come.

    • The way I see it, i would bet all the rent that the vast majority of transg’s have had therapy. did they find out they needed to identify with their sexual anatomy and play that gender’s role? i bet a few did.

      i say many more did not, and hopefully have a better sense of self, self respect, direction and hope than pre-therapy.

      The way I see it, i think we ALL need therapy for some disorder sooner or later. maybe relieve some forms of the rigidity.

    • Wendy Testaburger

      My reality trumps your phallacy. I ask, as many have, how the heck can you tell with actual Transgendered people? Because people saying that “someone will just say I have a vagina” and have easier route to prey are ALSO ignoring the fact that most of the pedophiles they fear are are pretty much open to little girls OR little boys. And, ffs, the DSM-III removed being Transgendered from the list of mental illnesses. It is just a damn bathroom. Most of us just use it and go.

  • What the frick ever happen to just plain old boy or girl . I guess we should have 10 different types of bathroom stalls one for the homosexual s for the lesbians one for the pedophiles one for the half-man half-woman and one for the woman half man I don’t know it’s all very confusing to me . All I know is I like to go to the men’s bathroom that’s it .

  • The most fun we ever had back in the 60’s was when we switched the “mens” and “womens” signs at the Shelter Cove Grotto bar. A lot strangers got introduced rather unexpectedly. Sadly, I’ve grown up since then….

    Kym’s folks may have been there for that, although I’m sure that they were completely innocent.

  • We are blowing up babies on the other side of the world with killer robots and this is the national discussion (face in palm)

  • Thank you for sharing your experiences. I am a survivor of a very similar type of childhood sexual abuse. It was done by extended family member and church members who were pedophiles. And one was also female.
    I am also friends with many people who have had a transgender experience. I’ve raised 4 kids and never once questioned their safety or wellbeing with my trans friends. In fact, just the opposite, I would be extremely reluctant to turn any young child over to people in a church simply because they identify as christian.
    If people want to do something to end childhood sex abuse, they should start by removing the Statue of Limitations so that adult survivors have legal recourse. That’s the fight that needs to happen. If you want to see the rats scurry out from under the floorboards, let adult survivors have the right to take their abusers to court.

  • Everyone has rights!!for awhile now every bathroom I’ve used just said “Restroom”lock the door no problem,let’s not make it a problem geeze

  • (1) Who made it a law of nature that men and women must use separate bathrooms? Do you have separate bathrooms for men and women in your home?

    (2) It will always be illegal for anyone to commit sexual misconduct (lewd acts, voyeurism, sexual harassment, sexual assault, etc.) in a public restroom regardless of his or her gender identity.

    (3) A lot of transgender folks physically look like the gender with which they identify. A transgender man forced to use the women’s restroom or a transgender woman forced to use the men’s restroom would be incredibly vulnerable to assault and harassment from others.

    • This. Excellent and accurate response. Laws already exist to prosecute pedophiles. So many of the commenters here are delusional and have no idea what they are talking about. Its not about you, so quit being so selfish and imposing your beliefs on others. They think its just about cross dressing, which is entirely different. If you have ever used a public bathroom chances are very good that you shared it with a trans person and didn’t know it. You are more likely to be molested by a right wing conservative christian than a trans person. Everything conservatives respond to is founded on fear. Talk about crybabies…

  • I hear you Ernie my dad Gene olsen Vic Bertain Andis burgess they probably were the ones who did it ,but I grew up on sprowl creek flat air port right across the street my grandparent Lloyd Swenson . Life was so awesome and simple back then . The 60s like I said very confusing on many levels .hi kym why are people bringing up sexual abuse that happened to them or someone else they know. what does that have to do with using same toilet with a transgender it’s not like you be standing in the urinal stall the guy comes up next to your piss stall ,and says to you oh by the way I’m a pedophile . Let’s get back to the subject of the topic why do you think it’s right to have a transgender come into your bathroom and you being a heterosexual male.

    • I think that transgender folks are already using your bathroom. The idea is that folks who identify, dress and feel like a woman would use a woman’s restroom and those that identify, dress and feel like a man would use a man’s restroom.

      These four women were identified as male when they were born.

  • I agree with that kym hell I think Diana Totten is one of the best people in the world I just luv her ,and I knew her as Dennis what ever makes you happy ,so I think she should use the ladys room . She lives her life as a woman ,but again people are straying into sexual abuse topics don’t see the realavince to this story ,and like I said this whole topic is very alien to me.trying to understand ,but I’m of another Era .and I just don’t comprehend it all.

  • Look up how many petofiles have indeed posed as transgenders, it happened more than you think, in hospitals, women’s shelters, restrooms, lockers rooms. I in no way think they are all bad, l know some transgenders who are wonderful people. But this policy is giving petofiles an extra advantage, in a world where woman especially young girls are preyed upon way too much.

  • no more unecessary laws, please.

    its not about sexuality. its about biology and sanitation. men and women excrete shit and piss. women also excrete blood. men piss on and around toilets. std’s that most often remain invisible on men can and do reek all kinds of havoc on women.

    people with both male and female genitalia need to recognize themselves as a legitimate fringe minority and act accordingly and intelligently, as is and has been happening every day in humboldt county just the same, sans beaurocracy, sans litigation. people are smart enough and overwhelmingly good enough to use common sense. a law mandating coed restrooms is ridiculous. its not about sexuality.

    everybody goes to the bathroom, it doesnt get more equal than that.

  • Women everywhere

    Any man, with his manhood still intact, has no business using a “ladies” room. If he’s been physically altered to sit and urinate like a woman, then he/she should be allowed to use the “ladies” room although, that still doesn’t make him a woman! I do not care who or what you “identify” with as long as you’re not entering into the ladies room with a penis!

  • This is why I say “thank god for stalls”

  • Hell what difference does it make,I will pee,take a crap no matter who is there.peaple need to stop being so judgmental. Only God can judge us not peaple.live and let live I say….but we live in a world who don’t believe in that.as long as gays,lesbians,and or transgender don’t push there beleafs on me we are all good..wise up America times are changing weather you like it or not…

  • There’s one big difference between pedophiles and Trans people.
    There are laws against Trans people using public restrooms now.

    There are no laws against pedophiles using them though. In fact, pedophiles such as Sen Hastart and Josh Duggar have been the most vocal in speaking of the dangers Trans people pose to children. I wonder why?

    • no more unecessary laws, please.

      sorry, but theres a monumental difference between refering to somebody as either transgendered or a pedophile. however, the root of this lame issue is a de facto law in north carolina that would mandate all restrooms to be coed. any place or business can, and many do, have single occupancy restrooms for both genders. any place or business can simply put a friendly sticker or poster or something that welcomes all to use their restrooms with transgendered consideration. that would be a respectful way to go about this. the angry vocal transgendered crowd is not being respectful of the overwhelming majority of the populations want of this basic separation, and for it to come of mutual respect, not beaurocratic legislation. thats equality. theres no need for arcata, for example, to adopt such a law mandating all restrooms be coed. please realize that this is about politics on paper, not the common sense of respect that just about everybody practices on a daily basis everywhere.

  • Thank you for sharing your story!

  • Women and girls are put in danger when random men can traipse freely through women’s spaces.

    Question: How can a woman tell the difference between a “nice” man in a dress and a psychpathic one? Answer: She can’t.

    And the fact is that even if they have had genital mutilation surgery, “transwomen” have the SAME rate of violent crime as normal men. Which happens to be 18 times that of women.

    LOTS of female impersonators (regardless of their “feelings”) have harmed women.

    https://autogynephiliatruth.wordpress.com/2016/04/09/what-are-your-pronouns/

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