‘Kind of Like a Transformer’

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Day Walker

Getting to know the world through other people’s eyes…that’s what this our personal account section is about. If you’ve got an anecdote to share, our email is [email protected].

Gender identification can be tricky–even a little uncomfortable. Maybe it doesn’t have to be that way. Recently, Day Walker, a local resident, was approached by a young boy with questions.

Walker relates what happened:

While in the waiting area at St Joseph’s on Friday, I noticed there was a young boy – maybe 7 or 8 years old – staring at my boots and the chain hanging off my jeans.

He approached me…He was so adorable – and his Mom was going to tell him to ‘leave people alone’ – but I glanced over at her and gave her a wink like ‘it’s ok, I don’t mind’…and this is how the conversation went:

Him: Are you a boy or a girl?
Me: Neither, but I suppose I’ve been both.
Him: [S]o kind of like a Transformer?
Me: Yeah, kind of like a Transformer….

Walker calls this interaction “one of the top Priceless moments I’ve ever had.”

 

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22 Comments
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Denise
Guest
Denise
8 years ago

A beautiful story! Kudos to the Mom for allowing her child to ask and to Day for being open to the question. A small moment that changed both their lives.

Manservant Patsy
Guest
Manservant Patsy
8 years ago

King Arthur: Old woman!
Dennis: Man.
King Arthur: Man, sorry. What knight lives in that castle over there?
Dennis: I’m 37.
King Arthur: What?
Dennis: I’m 37. I’m not old.
King Arthur: Well I can’t just call you “man”.
Dennis: Well you could say “Dennis”.
King Arthur: I didn’t know you were called Dennis.
Dennis: Well you didn’t bother to find out, did you?
King Arthur: I did say sorry about the “old woman”, but from behind you looked…
Dennis: What I object to is you automatically treat me like an inferior.

lauracooskey
Guest
lauracooskey
8 years ago

Language is the problem. Some of us only want to know what pronoun to use–is it a “he” or a “she”? I don’t like using the plural “they” or “their” to cover the possibilities. I like to write s/he, which sounds like “she” for everyone–but heck, after centuries of using a male pronoun for everyone, i think that’s okay. The objective case gets tricky–“herm” is the best combination of her and him. Possessive forms: hisr or hisrs (sounds like scissors.) These sound ridiculous, but so did “Ms.” when it first came out–now it’s perfectly respectable.
But we need a title of respect that’s neither masc. nor fem.: Neither Sir nor Ma’am, Mr. nor Ms. How would i address Mr/Ms Walker–only Day Walker works. So, i wish Day Walker all the respect s/he deserves, and thanks for the story.

hmmm
Guest
hmmm
8 years ago
Reply to  lauracooskey

I dont see that language is the problem when around 1% of people are born with intersex conditions. Do these terms refer to biological sex or gender?

Mark olsen
Guest
8 years ago

It s like this .YOU Eather Have A HOTDOG OR A BUN

Matt
Guest
Matt
8 years ago
Reply to  Mark olsen

It’s like this. Either you go to school and learn to spell, or you’re doomed to forever make both intersex-erasing and generally transphobic remarks on the internet. With bad spelling.

Watson
Guest
Watson
8 years ago
Reply to  Matt

And drive a p.o.s. GTX…

Anon Forrest
Guest
8 years ago
Reply to  Watson

I must ask: What’s a p.o.s.? af

Lost Croat Outburst
Guest
Lost Croat Outburst
8 years ago
Reply to  Anon Forrest

POS in the general jargon of web talk means Piece Of Shit. But I’m a geezer and still learning. It’s a derogatory term applied to animate and inanimate subjects.

Phoenix
Guest
Phoenix
8 years ago
Reply to  Mark olsen

Either you have intelligence and a good heart or your a Mark Olsen!

Confused
Guest
Confused
8 years ago
Reply to  Phoenix

After reading this article and comments I realize that I really don’t have a grasp on what it means to be transgender. Without being intentionally derogatory or rude I will admit that my understanding of human gender has always been very straightforward and along the lines of Mark Olsen’s thinking: “hot dog or bun”, XX or XY chromosomes, testicles or ovaries. What other possibilities are out there? Does “transgender” mean a human hermaphrodite, a man or woman trapped in a body of the opposite gender, or something else entirely? Is is biological or purely a psychological thing?

Anon Forrest
Guest
8 years ago
Reply to  Mark olsen

Actually, it’s like this: Minds are like parachutes, they only function when open. af

Hick
Guest
Hick
8 years ago

Ziggy ! Is that you?

TT
Guest
TT
8 years ago

Walker calls this interaction “one of the top Priceless moments I’ve ever had.”
Day, I hope you have many more. The innocence of a child with no judgement is how we all should be. Open to learning about each other accepting our are differences as just that .
I worry for the children that are lock up and beaten to be brainwashed into some BS political agenda. It is so important our elementary children are listen to by their teachers. That child that seeks attention by acting up, may be has never felt free to express themselves except in your class. Life at home maybe a hell you could not imagine.

hmmm
Guest
hmmm
8 years ago

Lets do a bit of research.

From OED;

he: Used to refer to a man, boy, or male animal previously mentioned or easily identified.

man: An adult human male.

male: Of or denoting the sex that produces small, typically motile gametes, especially spermatozoa, with which a female may be fertilized or inseminated to produce offspring. (Not a human specific def including sex chromosomes)

It seems to me that he,she, him, her ect. all refer to biological sex and not gender. Since only around 1% of people are born with intersex conditions, maybe we can drop this bullshit.

Even those born with intersex conditions can be determined to be of one biological sex or the other, they simply have unfortunate conditions.

Now if a person thinks that they are truly, deep inside, a dolphin, I will gladly call them Mr/Ms. Dolphin and I wont go out of my way to point out to them that they are, in fact, not a dolphin. But if you ask me privately, I wont tell you they are a real dolphin and a brave and beautiful one at that.

Anon Forrest
Guest
8 years ago
Reply to  hmmm

Hmmmm, have you heard of “conditions” of the mind? The judgments we make on observable “conditions” alone are not even half of reality. Your remarks, and the ignorance they expose, are a very large part of why I schooled my child at home; before bigotry could take a toll on her.
Great story, RHBB. Thanks! af

Alex
Guest
Alex
8 years ago
Reply to  hmmm

To be your authentic self in this world is brave and beautiful and not for the faint of heart.

Mark olsen
Guest
8 years ago

I didn’t mean to be derogatory I apologize if I offended anyone , and my pos gtx is fully restored ,and it will be down town the upcoming auto Rama I hope everyone that see s her this summer will enjoy it there isn’t a nut bolt that hasn’t been touched ,so with that being said I again I apologize if I insulted anyone I am ignorant to the plight of the transgender population I too am confused

Mikayla
Guest
Mikayla
8 years ago

trans·gen·der
transˈjendər,tranzˈjendər/
adjective
adjective: transgender; adjective: transgendered

denoting or relating to a person whose self-identity does not conform unambiguously to conventional notions of male or female gender.
“a transgender activist and author”

also resourced through Google is

https://genderneutralpronoun.wordpress.com/

LeAnna Carson-Hansen
Guest
LeAnna Carson-Hansen
8 years ago

Gender is taught at home.
By those raising the children.
Folks who are willing to set their boundaries, for the eventual day, their children will press against them or lean toward them.
To the familiar, to the safe.
The cultural fabric of our lives encompasses what we have learned as children, the learning years of one’s teens, to the twenties when we are often fleeing the norms of our childhood.
When one lives according to the path they have taken to walk it is often full of pain, joy and much growth.
I have no answers, only questions, which may or may not offend those who walk a different path than the one I am on.
I am happy to see the child in the OP formulate a satisfying response to the question.
Are we all transformers?
Changing as we grow, be it as a female, male, transgender, non-gender person.
What interesting times we are blessed to live in.
Regardless of all the “stuff” we have to deal with.
I take no offense in folks pondering or questioning.
It is all a part of the fabric of this life we live.

Wish The best For All!!
Guest
Wish The best For All!!
8 years ago

I made a comment that didn’t make it pass Kym. I guess it was a bit harsh and vulgar. I’ll try a different approach. People shouldn’t really care about what gender the next person is. Kind of like the color of ones’s skin, i doesn’t make or break that individual. People actions should represent who they truly are, not if they are male, female or even a “transformer”.

tugboat
Guest
8 years ago

I am 70 years old and It appears to me that homosexuality is increasing per population. So it cannot be a steady malfunction of the so called 2% rule. If it is increasing, I am sure everybody will agree, than one must believe that it is a disease, not unlike the flu or measles. In the 1960 you never heard of school personal or lawmakers ever trying to have unisex bathrooms in our schools. It was even brought up at Redway elementary in 1986. So I am not comfortable with the effects of this lifestyle on the general population. Individuals can do what ever they want. but sometimes the rest of society pays a price.