Are SoHummers More Giving? Or Just Bigger Suckers?
Kym Kemp / Nov. 11, 2011 @ 8:46 a.m. / Humboldt
Guest post by Kim McPherson:
So, in October, my son & I were in the parking lot of the mall in Eureka when this woman approached us.
“Are you from SoHum?” she says.
And I think, “Whoa, it must really show.”
We stop walking and confirm that we are indeed from SoHum.
“There’s something wrong with my ATM card & my Subaru is outta gas. I just need to get home. If you could help me out, I’ll pay you back. I live on Sawmill Road.”
Part of me thinks this is bullshit, but part of me wants to believe the stranded neighbor story. Unfortunately, I don’t have any small bills, so I turn to my son.
“You got a ten?” Like the kind young man he is, he fishes a bill from his wallet and hands it to the woman.
“Thanks so much! You guys are awesome!”
I tell her where she can find me to return my Son’s money & we smile and part ways.
I never see that ten again.
Last night, my Husband, my Son & I are in the parking lot at Target trying to decide if there is anything else we need from the big city when a woman approaches us.
“Hey, are you guys from SoHum?”
I recognize her. My response is a terse “Yes” as I stare at the pavement of the parking lot. I gave my Son’s money to this Bum! Because of people like her, he’ll probably be less likely to help people who might really need it & I’m just plain embarrassed…. like everyone can read the “SUCKER” that’s written on my forehead. I’m really hoping she’ll just walk away.
She doesn’t. She starts her little story.
Normally I’m a pretty kind person. A lot of the time when I’m angry no one can even tell. This isn’t one of those times. I can feel the anger rolling off of me like a foul stench.
“I’m not falling for it again!” As I say it, I look sideways at her. It startles her and she begins to fidget and mumble nervous laughter bubbles out of her mouth.
She sputters, “Do I know you?”
That sideways look again.
“Was I supposed to pay you back?”
“You were supposed to pay MY KID back!”
I look back at the ground. She mumbles and stutters.
“Whatever,” I reply like an angry teen.
She wanders off and we get in the car. As we drive away my Husband says, “I’ve never seen you be so mean.” And I have to explain the whole story to him. While I am, my Son says he didn’t believe her the first time but he knows I’m soft.
I thought telling the story would make me feel better… but I’m still mad.
Kim added in an email to me last night, “…[J]ust for fun I should tell [you] my neighbor got suckered Saturday at Rays Bayshore parking lot… I kinda gotta laugh– When you find a good gig, WORK IT.”
I know it is not the same, but honesty is still a “thing” in Humboldt.
That said, I don’t think that makes you a big sucker, Kym. I think it makes you a kind hearted person. It sucks that someone would take advantage of it.
I always think of it as good Karma. I give and I will receive. It doesn’t matter who I give it to. It only matters that I gave it to help another human being.
I think you’re awesome!
She knew my name and that I was the Chiro here
I gave her 20
then my gut felt bad
so I went to do other biz and purposefully came back to see her
I was just on time to see her go up to an other mark
I got out of my car and asked her how much money she needed to get home
that kind of blew her deal
The people who work for me says he’s a junkie who horks on the window so that he’ll have something to clean up.
I say who cares? I give first because I need to give, and second because he needs it.
If someone’s fallen so low, economically and spiritually, that they’re panhandling then I think they’re worse off than you are. You don’t need to believe the story. You can listen, but don’t even play the sucked in/not sucked in game.
Like the son said - he knew it was a line but he knew his mother was a softy so he gave the ten bucks. Smart kid, and a good kid. Mom should be proud.
But on the other hand I’m really proud of how kind & giving my community is! We all tried to help & that says something really beautiful.
“We came into Eureka to do our shopping, but we ran out of money…we’re not broke or anything, but we just need to get back home.” I agreed to give her $20 for gas (while her “partner” sat in the car) and she assured me it would be in the mail by morning. I never got it back. Then, the other day, I saw her again at Pierson’s and she came up to me asking “how do I know you?” (her way of not getting caught asking twice) I told her that she borrowed $20 from me a couple weeks ago. She said she only had a few dollars and her credit card. I asked if she still had my address. She said she still did. Still no money in the mail.