Don't Mess With This Old Guy

Mendocino grows some tough old folk.  A seventy-seven year old man in Willits, William Green, felt that a young fellow (age 20) owed him some money “from the sale of marijuana growing equipment.”  According to him, the young guy later called him asking to buy some pot.  Green said sure, come on over but he set a trap.  When the young dude got there, (according to the young dude’s tale of woe to law enforcement), Green threatened him with a gun and sprayed him in the face with a chemical. The young fellow being young immediately saw the upside to bringing in the law so he reported an armed robbery. He told officers that he had come to Green’s location to buy a half pound of marijuana from him but that the old guy had robbed him (Note to young guy–buying marijuana is illegal–law officers may not be totally on your side here.)

When the deputies contacted Green, Green explained that the young dude put his money and two jars of marijuana on the table (I’m curious–is it common to bring marijuana with you when you plan to buy some? ….But maybe the young guy figured a little smoke would smooth the ruffled feathers of the older guy–apparently it didn’t work.) Green invited the young fellow into the next room to get the “non existent Marijuana.”  There Green squirted lighter fluid on him and “was going to light him on fire”  (This seems to be taking things a might far!) The young dude (being a heck of a lot younger and sprier) manages to escape, grabbing some of his money and one of the two jars (me—I’d get all the money first but …who knows?  Maybe it was primo stuff.)  Green, according to him, shook a non-existent gun in an empty case to encourage the young fellow not to come back.

The deputies being somewhat disarmed at the infirmity of Green choose not to inflict tax payers with his medical expenses and left him with a citation to appear for this felony offense.

I’d really like to know what happens. I wonder if Mendocino needs jurors…


Now that’s my version of events.  Here’s the press release.

On 5/23/11 at 1600 HRS. Sheriff’s Deputies were dispatched to 16100 N. Hwy 101 Willits regarding a reported armed Robbery.  On arrival deputies contacted the 20 year old victim who advised he came to the location to purchase a half pound of Marijuana from the suspect. The victim said while in the suspects house, the suspect brandished a firearm and sprayed some type of chemical into his face keeping his money without getting his marijuana.

Deputies then contacted the suspect William Green 77 of Willits.  Green advised the victim owed him money from the sale of marijuana growing equipment. Green said when the victim called and wanted Marijuana he told him to come to Willits and get it.  Green said when the victim arrived, the victim put his money on the table and Green took him into the next room to get the non existent Marijuana.  Green said once in the room he squirted lighter fluid on the victim and was going to light him on fire when the victim pushed him into the wall and ran from the location taking some of his money back and one of two jars of Marijuana the victim had brought to the location.  Green said he also pointed a gun case at the victim to make him think he had a gun so he would not come back after leaving.

Due to Suspect Green having major medical issues Green was issued a citation to appear in court on the listed felony charge.

Approved By: Kurt Smallcomb


Photo of home where the above action occurred from this site.



  • This is why we love your column, Kym.

    You never know what story or characters (or beautiful pictures, drama, tragedy, community issues, or commentary) might show up. Always something new, unusual, informative or relevant, and always well done.

    For example, today yours truly learned to treat people well, always be on good terms, pay your debts promptly, travel lightly, never overstay a visit, and please don’t piss off Mr. Green.

  • 77 is the new 40…!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *