TP:It's an Issue

After taking this photo of the toilet paper in our bathroom, I have to wonder…Should I buy some Exlax?

And, although I did have a nice Christmas post all ready, I couldn’t resist the following story sent by someone with a sick sense of humor…

that I share….


A woman went up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestured alluringly to the bartender who approached her immediately. She seductively signaled that he should bring his face closer to hers. As he did, she gently caressed his full beard.

“Are you the manager?” she asked, softly stroking his face with both hands.

“Actually, no,” he replied.

“Can you get him for me? I need to speak to him,” she said, running her hands beyond his beard and into his hair.

“I’m afraid I can’t,” breathed the bartender.. “Is there anything I can do?”

“Yes. I need you to give him a message,” she continued, running her forefinger across the bartender’s lip and slyly popping a couple of her fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them gently.

“What should I tell him?” the bartender managed to say.

“Tell him,” she whispered, “There’s no toilet paper, handsoap, or paper towels in the ladies room.”

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17 comments

  • OH NO!!!! That’s hilarious! Good response to no toilet paper. Not that I would ever do anything like that. Of course not.

  • My son says the reason I’ve only gotten one comment on this post is because now everyone can tell I’m really a 13 year old boy pretending to be a lady.

    :Snicker:

    Its just you, Jen, and I and one of my aunts (an otherwise very respectable and nice lady with perfectly coiffed hair) who have such a sick sense of humor!

  • My son says the reason I’ve only gotten one comment on this post is because now everyone can tell I’m really a 13 year old boy pretending to be a lady.

    :Snicker:

    Its just you, Jen, and I and one of my aunts (an otherwise very respectable and nice lady with perfectly coiffed hair) who have such a sick sense of humor!

  • Makes me think of a saying my friend has when talking about an attractive woman: “I’d drink her bathwater.” I imagined that if she was sufficiently seductive, the bartender may not have cared… 😉

  • Makes me think of a saying my friend has when talking about an attractive woman: “I’d drink her bathwater.” I imagined that if she was sufficiently seductive, the bartender may not have cared… 😉

  • I’m, of course, talking about other people who wouldn’t care…the bartender, of course…ahem…

  • I’m, of course, talking about other people who wouldn’t care…the bartender, of course…ahem…

  • Chris, our entire family is rolling on the floor laughing. Would that be MROF–Mass Rolling on the floor?

  • Chris, our entire family is rolling on the floor laughing. Would that be MROF–Mass Rolling on the floor?

  • Hey, I think this gal had the right approach! But I’m not sure if a roll of paper towels in your bathroom would be quite as user friendly as Charmin!

  • Hey, I think this gal had the right approach! But I’m not sure if a roll of paper towels in your bathroom would be quite as user friendly as Charmin!

  • Actually, that is an extra roll of toilet paper (partially used because one of my children prefers to use the stashed toiled paper to the one on the roller!!) that got attacked by a spider one night.

  • Actually, that is an extra roll of toilet paper (partially used because one of my children prefers to use the stashed toiled paper to the one on the roller!!) that got attacked by a spider one night.

  • It looks very large! I guess it needs a ruler beside it to give some sense of perspective. Hee hee. I’m not too big on spiders or their webs, and probably it is hiding inside the roll! Yikes!

  • It looks very large! I guess it needs a ruler beside it to give some sense of perspective. Hee hee. I’m not too big on spiders or their webs, and probably it is hiding inside the roll! Yikes!

  • Now Spider lurking in toilet paper–That is Creepy!

  • Now Spider lurking in toilet paper–That is Creepy!

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